May I inquire about how to be a person’s lord?9 I say: Make divisions and distributions according to ritual. Be evenhanded, inclusive, and not one-sided. May I inquire about how to be a person’s minister? I say: Serve (85) your lord according to ritual. Be loyal, compliant, and not lazy. May I inquire about how to be a person’s father? I say: Be broadminded, kind, and follow the dictates of ritual. May I inquire about how to be a person’s son? I say: Be respectful, loving, and have utmost good form. (90) May I inquire about how to be a person’s elder brother? I say: Be compassionate, loving, and display friendliness. May I inquire about how to be a person’s younger brother? I say: Be respectful, acquiescent, and do nothing improper. May I inquire about how to be a person’s husband? I say: Be (95) extremely hardworking and do not stray. Be extremely watchful and follow proper distinctions. May I inquire about the proper way to be a person’s wife? I say: If your husband follows the dictates of ritual, then compliantly obey him and wait upon him attentively. If your husband does not (100) follow the dictates of ritual, then be apprehensive but keep yourself respectful.10 If these ways are established in a one-sided manner,11 then there will be chaos, but if they are established in a comprehensive manner, there will be order, so this matter is worth keeping watch over.12 ― Xun Kuang, Xunzi: The Complete Text

May I inquire about how to be a person’s lord?9 I say: Make divisions and distributions according to ritual. Be evenhanded, inclusive, and not one-sided. May I inquire about how to be a person’s minister? I say: Serve (85) your lord according to ritual. Be loyal, compliant, and not lazy. May I inquire about how to be a person’s father? I say: Be broadminded, kind, and follow the dictates of ritual. May I inquire about how to be a person’s son? I say: Be respectful, loving, and have utmost good form. (90) May I inquire about how to be a person’s elder brother? I say: Be compassionate, loving, and display friendliness. May I inquire about how to be a person’s younger brother? I say: Be respectful, acquiescent, and do nothing improper. May I inquire about how to be a person’s husband? I say: Be (95) extremely hardworking and do not stray. Be extremely watchful and follow proper distinctions. May I inquire about the proper way to be a person’s wife? I say: If your husband follows the dictates of ritual, then compliantly obey him and wait upon him attentively. If your husband does not (100) follow the dictates of ritual, then be apprehensive but keep yourself respectful.10 If these ways are established in a one-sided manner,11 then there will be chaos, but if they are established in a comprehensive manner, there will be order, so this matter is worth keeping watch over.12
― Xun Kuang,

Xunzi: The Complete Text

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