veto power can obscure personal agency and accountability in relationships. A partner who says, I must break up with you, I have no choice because my primary partner demands it, is, in fact, choosing to end that relationship. Shifting responsibility for this choice onto a third party (or phrasing a breakup decision in terms of we, when only the primary partners comprise that we) may be a rhetorical sleight-of-hand to deflect personal accountability while hurting someone. ― Amy Gahran, Stepping Off the Relationship Escalator: Uncommon Love and Life

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veto power can obscure personal agency and accountability in relationships. A partner who says, I must break up with you, I have no choice because my primary partner demands it, is, in fact, choosing to end that relationship. Shifting responsibility for this choice onto a third party (or phrasing a breakup decision in terms of we, when only the primary partners comprise that we) may be a rhetorical sleight-of-hand to deflect personal accountability while hurting someone.
― Amy Gahran,
Stepping Off the Relationship Escalator: Uncommon Love and Life

veto power can obscure personal agency and accountability in relationships. A partner who says, I must break up with you, I have no choice because my primary partner demands it, is, in fact, choosing to end that relationship. Shifting responsibility for this choice onto a third party (or phrasing a breakup decision in terms of we, when only the primary partners comprise that we) may be a rhetorical sleight-of-hand to deflect personal accountability while hurting someone.
― Amy Gahran,

Stepping Off the Relationship Escalator: Uncommon Love and Life

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